I mentioned in my last post that I would be talking about the biggest milestone I have faced in my journey to becoming more toned and looking good under my clothes. A better way of putting it I guess is that I'd like to have a bikini body. I've never had one before, and I'd like to order one now pretty please.
So I mentioned I've been exercising pretty hard core (well, pretty hard core for me) since about March. I am definitely seeing some changes. For example, I FEEL healthier. I can run longer and faster before getting tired. I see some definite changes to my leg, thigh, and butt muscles. People have told me that I look healthier. My mom told me that I look prettier. One person I know tells me that I "radiate beauty," which is just the absolute greatest thing that anyone could ever say to me. I don't know if I am giving off a healthier look or what. I'm not sure, but I like it.
HOWEVER. These people don't see what I see. There is a terrible demon that everyone knows about, I'm pretty sure everyone has it at some point in their life, and it is pretty hard to get rid of. I am talking about "fatty deposits causing a dimpled or uneven appearance, as around the thighs or buttocks." Yes. I am talking about CELLULITE.
diet dr. pepper. With continued research, I found out that diet sodas, especially caffeinated diet sodas, decrease your chance of being able to get rid of cellulite! It does NOT cause cellulite. But it can make cellulite more noticeable. Hence my issue. http://www.livestrong.com/article/305514-diet-pop-and-cellulite/
Anyone that knows me knows how much I love diet dr. pepper. I drink 528 oz or more of it per week (88 oz per working day, and 88 oz per weekend). It's an addiction, and it calls to me. No one has ever been able to give me a single reason to stop drinking it that I have cared about. Until now. I REALLY don't want cellulite.
When I found out, I almost started crying. I went through the seven stages of grief, and I committed to stop drinking my diet dr. pepper. This was last weekend. My first day off diet soda was last Friday. I have never been so thirsty in my entire life. I drank almost 100 oz of water. I also had a ginormous headache. I ended up caving and got 32 oz. Monday I had 130 oz of water! I have never drunk that much water in my life! I didn't have any diet dr. pepper again until Tuesday. I was just having a really busy and kind of a rough day, and diet dr. pepper just makes everything more pleasant. Normally when I go without my beverage for too long, that first sip is magical. It runs through my whole body and my face lights up; it's like a drug! My first time drinking it in four days was quite a different experience. It wasn't magical. It was just like any other drink. I catalogued that in my brain for the next time I wanted some.
So today I had a splitting headache. I've been having a lot of headaches since my departure from my dear friend. Today's was really bad. I decided to get another 32 oz. It was, again, not the magical experience that I am used to. The headache eased up a bit, but I didn't even finish my drink. I am in complete and utter shock that in four days I have lost my dependence for my beverage! It still tastes good, I still feel like I should get it, but it no longer calls to me, and it isn't magical anymore. What an astonishing four days!
One of the hardest things about giving up my drink is that I love going to Maverick. I truly love the gas station attendants that help me every day. It is almost heart breaking to not have a reason to go see them every day! I was trying to think of something I could go get every day instead of diet dr. pepper, but gas stations aren't a great place for someone trying to maintain a healthy lifestyle, especially on a limited budget.
So far this week I have had 64 oz of diet dr. pepper where I normally would have had at least 308 oz by now. I may have "caved in" on two days, but I am okay with slowing weaning myself off as long as the end result is the same - losing the caffeine addiction and having a great butt. Even when I have kicked the habit, I won't say no to an occasional beverage, as long as they are few and far between. We can't deny our pleasures, otherwise there is no balance in life.
Giving up my beverage has been the hardest thing I've ever done, and these headaches are killer. But I've been working so hard and I don't want anything to stand in my way. In my next post I'll tell you about the my first massage experience to reward myself for running 50 miles.
Today I'm grateful for my friend Nanna. She was with me on my first day without diet dr. pepper. Whenever she was talking to me, I couldn't pay attention, because all I could think about was how much I wanted some diet dr. pepper! But she got me through it! She is also a massage therapist and is AMAZING at her job. She gave me some great insights that I'll tell you about in my next post.
Please send me your struggles and how you've gotten through them!