Monday, March 7, 2011

It's About Freaking Time

I am finally ready to be more open. I keep mentioning how I had a specific milestone in mind for when I would reveal my weight, and I have hit that milestone. Please be gentle, it's really hard for me to reveal this information.

I stepped on the scale today and recorded a loss of 4 lbs since I last checked for a grand total of 66 lbs lost. This puts me at 140 lbs.

Why is 140 lbs a big deal to me? Because my drivers' license states that I weigh 140 lbs, and it has said that since I got it when I was sixteen. They don't weigh you, they just ask you. You can say whatever you want! I lied when I was sixteen about how much I weighed. I don't remember by how much, just that I lied, but it was at least a twenty pound lie. My drivers' license is accurate for the first time, except for maybe the picture. Maybe this is silly, but it has always been important to me.

Now, I know you can all add, which is why I never wanted to reveal my weight. I've lost 66 lbs, and I now weigh 140 lbs, which means at my peak weight I weighed 206 lbs. This is horrifying to me to let this information go. There are two sides to this number. I saw this number on the scale after Christmas 2009, and that number didn't stick around for very long. It was the biggest number I ever saw on the scale. However, there were times when I was too afraid to even step on the scale, so while 206 was the biggest number I ever saw, that doesn't mean that was the biggest number I ever weighed. I don't have the most accurate of records, but I'm guessing that by the time I went in for my neurologist appointment in February 2010 I weighed just under 200. Scary thoughts.

I will update my Progress page with my Weight and BMI charts and new inches and everything soon. Also, my goal has changed. My goal was to make it to 115 lbs, which would mean that I have another 25 lbs to lose. But as I have mentioned, I have been working with a personal trainer, and she says that since I am working out, a more realistic goal for me would be 125 lbs. This means I only have another 15 lbs to lose. This is good news, but weight loss has been slow as of late.

Today I am thankful for all the support I've had so far. I could not have made it this far without my friends and family.