Tuesday, December 14, 2010

"Because You're Skinny"

When I was a little girl, I took a ballet class for two years. I loved ballet, and it was a lot of fun. But I wasn't very committed to it, as I was never a very girly girl, so I didn't continue after that. I was remembering the other day about a conversation I had with my first year ballet teacher way back then. I was probably nine years old at the time. We were taught to suck our stomachs in while dancing. When I did this, my ribs would poke out. I asked my teacher why my ribs poked out? What did that mean? Her answer was very simple. Much too simple for me to accept. She said "because you're skinny." I laughed at her and told her that was not true. All the other girls in the class were skinny, but not me!

What a sad reaction for a little girl to have. Why didn't I believe her? Here is a picture of my ballet class after our recital that year. I am in the front row in the middle, third to the right. Sorry for the terrible picture quality. I'm not the skinniest girl in the class, which must be why I didn't accept my teacher's answer. It was always one extreme or the other for me. But I was average. I look just like everyone else in the class.

Why was I thinking about this the other day? Because I'm starting to be able to see my ribs again. This is not because I am skinny. What does skinny mean anyway? Everyone seems to have their own definition. I have decided to define it as being in a healthy weight range. This means I am not quite "skinny" yet, but I am getting close. So even though I didn't believe my ballet teacher all those years ago, maybe I'll believe her soon.

Today I'm grateful for all the crazy bones I can now see. Like my ribs, and whatever the bones around your neck are.

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